When I'm a little old lady...
I’ll live with my children and bring them great joy
To repay all I’ve had from each girl and boy.
I shall draw on the walls and scuff up the floor…
Run in and out without closing the door.
I’ll hide frogs in the pantry, socks under my bed
Whenever they scold me, I’ll just hang my head.
I’ll run and I’ll romp, always fritter away
The time spent doing chores everyday.
I’ll pester my children when they’re on the phone
As long as they’re busy, won’t leave them alone!
Hide candy in closets and rocks in a drawer
And never pick up my clothes on the floor.
Dash off to the movies and not wash a dish
I’ll plead for allowance whenever I wish.
I’ll stuff up the plumbing and deluge the floors
As soon as they mop it up, I’ll flood it some more!
When they correct, me I’ll lie down and cry
Kicking and screaming ― not a tear in my eye.
I’ll take their pencils, their flashlights, and then
When they buy new ones, I’ll take them again!
Put toys on the table, spill jam on the floor…
I’ll break lots of dishes as though I were four.
I’ll stir up some cookies or perhaps make a cake
But I won’t clean the mess from whatever I make.
I’ll not make my bed or clean up my room
I’ll pretend I’ve never heard of vacuum or broom.
I’ll take a bath, but won’t clean the tub
I’ll just leave it ― for my children to scrub!
I shall use two or three towels and maybe some more
Then I will just drop them right on the floor.
What fun I shall have, what joy it will be...
To live with my children like they lived with me!
By Elayne Pearson